connexion: the selector

I Author My Own Disaster, Part Four

stems

the thing that surprises me most is what it feels like when we say good+night,

and how i feel it in my chest.

it’s incredible the new colors that things you thought were S-O-L-I-D take:

+like the curvature of the earth,

+and capital letters,

++and time,

+the future,

+++the number three,+++

(the scent of my neck;

the sweat at the back of my head,

and also my ankles and knees.)

Everything takes on new colors,

and Nothing’s shape makes sense.

Download: The Verve - Grey Skies
Buy the Album: The Verve - History, CD2

I Author My Own Disaster, Part Three

lightning over oradea, romania; 17 august 2005

I love lightening, especially here.

Until I had lived in a place that gets hot and humid but also grey and wet I had never seen lightning that reaches down with long, slick fingers to caress the ground,

like a serpentine tongue that will split you in two,

like tasting dirty sweat from the crease of an elbow,

or behind a knee.

I feel it’s switch and twitch behind my eyes,

I understand being held steady by electricity like that.

Before here I only understood the whole sky becoming white,

in the middle of the night.

It’s strong, to be sure, it’s arresting,

but it’s not the same thing as fingertips,

or better,

a palm.

+i like especially being terrified that the strength of it will make my heart stop,

(like being slapped across the face,

or watching machines smash against each other,

dangerously,)

Download: My Bloody Valentine - Swallow, Moon Song, Slow
Buy the Album: My Bloody Valentine - Tremolo, You Made Me Realise (gift? because you adore me? and are ridiculously rich? and like anonymous adoration? yeah? THANK YOU!!)

I Author My Own Disaster, Part Two

you know, and that’s the important thing. (redux)

“i wanted you to eat me whole
i wanted to swim inside of you
carry me along against your ribs
lick the ventricles, caress your spine
i wanted to curl inside your instep
or find your adam’s apple on my tongue
i wanted you to eat me until
i could not swallow without your saliva

i was too small for your mouth“

Tell me our origin story again.

Please?

I love our origin story.

+We are the most beautiful myth.

Download: Catherine Wheel - Shallow, Indigo is Blue, Flower to Hide, Ferment
Buy the Album: Catherine Wheel - Ferment,

I Author My Own Disaster, Part One

you know, and that’s the important thing.

I want to destroy all the books.

Can we destroy all the books?

+I sleep so well now, since you.

Download: Of Montreal - The Past is a Grotesque Animal
Buy the Album: Of Montreal - Hissing Fauna, Are You the Destroyer?

Songs for Secret Bee-Hiving, Part Four

i don’t remember and i’m sorry.

We could set them next to each other.

+but no touching

You know–a competition,

where everyone wins.

+turn over, turn out the light

Download: Tindersticks - Sleepy Song
Buy the Album: Peel Session ‘94 - Thank you, Internet!